i mean i wish to become an artiste.... a singer.... an actress.... haha.... cuz i wan to earn money n let ppl get to notice me n noe who am i..... haha..... i feel my life is pretty boring as i dun have many frenz..... but if i became an entertainer, i'd be soooooo busy tat i can even forget to eat my meals.... haha.... oh well.... it's a day dream.... like ppl said, dream is more faster.... haha....

but anyway, i really wish to become 1..... jo said tat she'll support me to go into this..... hehe.... jo u're really a true fren.... hehe.... ^.^ if i really get a tiny bit of fame, i really hope tat u'll be my 1st fan n the chairperson of my official fan club ah........ hahaha..... :P

well, another reason i wanted to go into entertainment world, is tat i wan to earn money to allow my parents to move out of the asshole market, n open a kopitiam of their own... tat asshole mkt ah.... even the ppl r asshole...... loads of em, tons of em...... well, but NOT all r asshole..... some r really nice ppl..... but i really HATE those assholes, bitches..... n some more, the sales there r not really good. there's seldom crowds there.... there's only crowds in the morning n lunchtime... but den frm lunchtime onwards, most ppl will order drinks like sugar cane, greass jelly, etc n not coffees or sotf drinks...... haiz...... tat's y sales not really good..... n u noe wat, a sugar cane juice stall is juz beside us...... i get jealous whenever dey got a large cust, like 1 cust is packing 10 pkts of sugar cane juices n not 10 pkts of coffees or soft drinks.... haiz....dey're (the sugar cane boss) is earning more (much more) dan us..... tat's y i dun wan my parents to stay there anymore.... dey deserve better, a kopitiam of their own..... yeah..... tat's y i wna to earn a lot of money to let em able to open a kopitiam.... i noe it's not easy being an entertainer, cuz it's not easy to get famous.... but no matter wat, i do wish to give it a try......

so currently my aim is to slim down first. den i can go like participate in shows like SG idols, or project superstar...... haha..... but there's 1 thing i'm wondering.... am i too old 4 this? i mean am i too old to start an entertainment career? haha..... i hope not.... :P

Hey Hey jo.... haha.... i can't wait.... hehe.... well, i wish to go to many parts of aust too.... haiz.... it's always tat S-11 factor tat stops us... haiz.... but hey! heard tat if u work in the airport, u get to fly to a country every yr nor.... hahaha..... 1 of my mum's fren's son work in the airport, n he juz came back frm US..... hahaha..... :P so well, i wish to work in the airport too..... haiz..... haha....

well, anyway, back to the issue.... hoho, i'd like to go back to gold coast as it's been a reeeeaaal long time since i was there.... i really wanna go back to esp movieworld n dreamworld..... only dse 2..... hmmmm or rather, we go on a tour grp lah..... den can go diff plcs.... i saw some adverts on gng to Sydney, Melbourne n Gold Coast 4 like 7 or 9 days...... hmmm..... waddya tink? maybe we go on a tour grp wuld be better? btw.... u mind i ask my neighbour along? haha... :P but den she did suggest i ask my old pri sch mates along..... but den i guess dey won't go one lah..... haha.... hmmm, how many ppl u have there? maybe we try to count now den base on a estimate num of ppl... we see how we can plan ba......

haha..... it seems like i'm writing a msg 4 u on my blog..... :P hehe..... well anyway, u'll be reading dis.... haha..... u see how many ppl u have over there whose interested in gng..... den we decide again lor........ hehehe...... do u mind if i ask karen n cindy along? if mind, nvm..... i wont ask em..... hehe...... remember to reply me ah...... :P

Wonder wat's gng on wif my life..... :( i'm so envy those ppl wif many frenz..... while i only got like 3/4 close frenz tat can talk...... the rest, i either dun get to see em or had stopped contacting altogether.... hmmm.... within the 3 /4 close frenz.... 1, u send msg ot her, she dun even bother to reply u...... 2, she got her own grp of frenz n always meeting up wif em..... 3, although i known her 4 like 20 yrs, n we're really really super close when we're like in sec sch... but den, dun noe how, we fell apart, now talk very general stuffs..... can't really talk abt anything personal..... :( haiz.... dun noe y like tat.... it's like i'm soooo alone.....

Yeah, some wuld say i still have my sis... but den those 2 ah..... haiz.... got each other can liao..... no need me one.....i dun noe wat's wrong wif my life.... haiz.... i've got no nothing.... no close frenz, no circle of frenz, no bf, no career, no money, no nothing...... i such a huge failure..... wat shld i do? i tried talking to ppl, interacting wif everyone.... but it dun seem to work..... i'm a natural-born introvert...... i can't take the intiative to chat wif ppl.... cuz i dun noe how to start.....

most of my frenz r all females..... no males..... oh alright, there's some.... but most all no contact one..... 'cept frm my wrkpl one...... haiz...... n u noe wat, 1 of my lecturers say.... an certified accountant, shld have a wide social circle.... dey shld have many frenz frm all walks of life... but 4 person like me, i dun tink so..... tat's y now i tinking of stop studying accounting.... i dun tink it really suits me..... i can't even pass 1 ACCA level 2 paper..... haiz..... i tried to tell my parents abt it.... initially dey say fine wif it, but later when i talk more abt it, dey wuld tell me to finish studying it..... i dun understand y..... i already told em tat i'm not interested abt it anymore..... but dey keep telling me to finish it by hook or by crook..... haiz..... i'm really stressed..... how i wish i can drop dead rite now..... den i won't have to fuss abt anything..... but i dun have any illness.... can't die frm illness..... accident.... i'm a pretty careful person...... haiz....... i'm a chicken person, dun dare to commit suicide......

HELP!!!!!!!!! can anyone help me?!?!?! i really wish to widen my circle of frenz but dun noe how, i have very low confidence n self-esteem..... n i dun have the looks..... i really wish i have more frenz dan i do now, n i can find someone who loves me real soon.....

but i guess.... i'll stay single my whole life til i die...... i'm pretty sure abt it...... ppl say in this world, there'll definately be someone of the opp. side destined to be wif u.... but i guess, the person who is destined to be wif me, is either had become a gay or had died...... i'm pretty sure abt it..... so i guess i'll remain single all my life le..... haiz.... i'm really envy those who have someone to love her, someone to protect her...... but i dun tink i'll be the one.....

hey Jan, Jo..... nxt time when u gals do get married, dun send me an invitation plse.... haha.... cuz i'll not be turning up..... i'll send my best greetings to u gals, but i'm not showing up..... so u dun need to send me an invitation..... i'm sorry, but i mean it..... haha....

i dun noe y suddenly i'm saying all these..... but if u dun like to read this, plse dun..... i'm writing these only to get all this things out of my chest......